happiness is a word.

Happiness.

Happiness, happiness, happiness…

It’s a word. But what it is?
I still haven’t quite figured it out.

Sadness on the other hand, I know way too well…

Emptiness…

Loneliness…
Lonesomeness…

negativity. That’s all I see in the words that I’ve written after happiness…
But why? Is it because I try so hard to be happy? Content? … And therefore I never will be?
I wish someone could tell me what life is about…

I wish I never felt all alone in the world.
Sometimes, like now, the emotion is so strong it tears me up. And for what? I make myself feel like this… I wish I didn’t, but I do…
And I feel like I have no one to turn to. I have no one but myself. And its hard.
In the end you only have yourself – that I know, but it doesn’t make anything any easier to know it…

But I guess thats just how it is… Good days… Bad days… But so many times I’ve wished I wasn’t on this earth anymore… So why am I?

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