I think I make him feel the way you make me feel.
I think he thinks of me, as much as I think of you.
When we’re together it feels so good, but when we’re apart you feel so cold.
I cant quite figure it out. Is it a game or is it the actual reality?
Are we being honest?
I am not being honest with him, hell, I’m not even honest with you.
Are you being honest with me?
I doubt it.
Perhaps I should be the one to take the first step, and tell how I really feel, deep down. The ugly, beautiful and raw truth. Exposing myself.
I talk about overcoming fears and boundaries all the time, perhaps it is time to do that emotionally too.
Yes I might get hurt, but perhaps not telling hurts me more.
In the end, I know that this is the only way and the only right way to go about life, so I might as well get used to it already…
… I want to tell you, how I love to be in your arms. How I love when you comfort me when I’m sad. I want to tell you how I love when nothing else matters, and its just you and me. It feels like we’re in a different world, nothing matters, all is calm and life is just wonderful.
I want to tell you that it hurts me to know when another female gets your time and attention, and I want you to know that I know that that’s just how it is and needs to be.
I myself am not ready to take on the responsibility and commitment that it takes to ‘stop’ this from happening…
I want to tell you, that yes, I enjoy the company of others, but you never leave my mind – not even then. I think about you all the time, you’re with me – even when you’re not.
I want to watch the stars with you, I want to watch a beautiful and peaceful sunrise and sunset. I want to look at a beautiful view with your arms around me.
I want to experience world wonders with you next to me.
I want to be the reason you smile every day.
I want to learn and grow with you, I want to laugh and cry with you.
I want you to reach the skies, and I want you to believe there are no limits – to anything.
I want you to believe in love…
And truth be told, I want you to believe in me, and us.
I want to tell you, that you annoy me when you tease me too much.
I want to tell you that sometimes you’re too silly, and I want to tell you that in the end that’s what makes you, you, and I guess that’s why I am still here.
I want to tell you that I trust you, and I do, I’ve never trusted you as much as I do now… But in general I don’t trust anybody to handle my heart…
I want to tell you that I think I could fall in love, but I am too scared to let myself.
I want to tell you that I like you and care for you – a lot.
I want to tell you that not once did you ever leave my mind when we were apart, no matter how hard I tried, I never stopped thinking about you.
I want to tell you that I think in a previous life, this life or a future life, you and I were, could or would be perfect for one another…
I want to tell you, that I haven’t met anyone yet that I like spending time with as much as I do with you…
But then again, I am not sure if that is because I am not letting anyone come as close to me as you…
Truth be told, in the end, I don’t think I am letting any guy get a chance, because you are in the back of my mind… Someone would really need to wow me to a level I have never been wow’ed, I think…
I don’t know what I want, but I know I like you, I know I enjoy your company…
And I know that if someone can hurt me or make me happy in an instant, its you.
I’m not sure if that’s positive or negative… However, I know it’s the truth.
There’s probably a hundred more things I could tell you, but none of it is coming to mind right now…
I just know, I do feel something, or else I’d be unbothered… I just need to find out what it is I feel, and why exactly…